I have an amazing mother. She instilled upon me the lesson from Bambi, "If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all." Now if anyone needed to hear this growing up, it was me. The advice served me well, when I decided to follow it, but it took Kim Scott's book to get me to understand that as a boss, saying the things that weren't nice was now my responsibility. She gave me a language I could use to help my team become their best.